Dress Form

For most of my life I have been considered skinny and I am. In fact, I tend to cause nicer clothing stores a problem. The assistants in my favourite store in my home town will sigh a slight sigh of resignation every time I come out of the change room and indicate that yet another skirt or pair of pants is too big. She doubtfully says, "I'll see if we have a smaller size." and my mother looks at her watch yet again while hissing "ten minutes left on the parking meter".

Here in town, I was taken back when I entered a boutique and the assistant took one look at me and said, "We don't carry your size." I looked at her taken back. She added for emphasis, "Nothing is going to fit you." Plus sized people can complain about how hard it is to fit clothes that fit, but frankly, anyone outside of the "normal" sizes has problems finding clothing that fits.

However, tonight I have discovered that I have large waist, or a small bust, or hips that ought to belong to another person, or that my body is just way out of proportion.

It seemed simple enough. I had decided that I wanted a dress form. All I wanted was a form that I could stick pins into, whirl the knobs and hope for the best. But deep down, I wanted the ultimate dress form - one that was made to your measurements!

A quick look through the sites that do just that - make a form for your measurements - seemed to me way too expensive and well, actually messy. Most places seem to want to sell you a DVD so that you can encase your body in plaster of paris and with the help of a friend willing to extract you from your body cast and a little bit of luck, you will instantly have a body double. And if that seems a little too daunting, then you can pay lots of money and a firm will do it for you.

Next down the lists was a dress form in a higher quality. Oddly enough, it seems that better dress forms are non adjustible. So I started looking at the measurements. I tend to look for the waist measurement, check the bust measurement, see if it's close, then check for the right bust measurement and then check the waist measurement. Really, if girls are told that Barbie is damaging to their self esteem, then they should never try and buy a dress form.

On a good day, I have a 26 and a bit" waist. This is a "I've been eating correctly and I'm not sure what happened" waist. It will go down to 26" which is a "I've been way too stressed recently and it's wrecking havoc on my body" waist. This is also when friends and family start to get a funny look on their face and make comments about how important it is to eat well.

So it was with some shock that I discovered that one manufacturer of dress forms thought that I should, wait for it, have a TWENTY-FOUR INCH WAIST. Does anyone have a 24" waist? Dress pattern sizes are a bit out of touch with clothing sizes, hence being a size four in the store and then a size eight on the pattern, but everyone knows that's because the dress manufacturers keep moving the sizes down. So for those who are supposed to be the guardians of the true size to proclaim that I should have a 24" waist was a serious blow.

I've found a new option. You wear a garbage bag and have someone tape you in. The famous duct tape dummy. It's going to be an interesting week-end.